Stewardesses babble in Dutch. The seats are bright blue, the airplane smell is familiar and makes my insides squirm a little.
Am I ready to travel 21,000 km to perform 14 shows in 5 countries?
I wanted to tour Europe so badly that it’s actually happening!
But I feel dread, nervous for undertaking a tour, nerves for the performances, nerves for the days off.
This tour is a way to prove to myself that I can do it solo. I don’t want the last time I toured to be the highlight of my life. So I have to make this time better.
On my way to the first show-
The sun reflects on the black highway, making it gold.
Listening to a dead singer. Her voice deteriorated until she couldn’t sing anymore. And the hi-hat filled the space instead, like the ticking of a clock, annoying and soothing.
Expectations and murmurs.
Before I perform, I can hear people talking about Trike. I feel their nostalgia and expectations weighing on me, and I don’t know how to deal with it… I get onstage.
The show goes well! The first show is over and I feel at home already!
We take a bus through Germany, up winding paths that look like they come from a travel pamphlet.
After 2 shows, we’re joined by Jonah in Berlin. He points out that touring is performing a little and preparing a lot. Packing, unpacking, packing, unpacking and trying to remember if you’ve packed everything.
I meet old friends that hug me like mothers and smile like teenagers in love. I’ve forgotten how many familiar faces I know, until I see them again. And how wonderful familiar faces are when you’re on the road.
After a week on tour, experiences are filling me up and I’m unable to process them all. I hope to sop them up and get inspired. (I try to feel some sensation of frustration because happiness isn’t good for inspiration!)
The shows are going better than I could imagine, the crowds, the sound, the light projections…
Life is pretty good and there’s still tomorrow.